Sensual Philosophy …

This blog entry is one part of a series of three conversations that I had with my ex Ria Yoshida. The conversation was forwarded (via myspace mail) to others either because I thought they would find it interesting, or because they were going through something similar. That eventually became tedious, so I decided to post it as a blog entry. However, this entry is not meant for public consumption. It is a tailored technique.

Whenever I am guiding, I conform to the person I’m speaking to. Sometimes I’ll be passive, other times forceful. With it being customized, the information contained may serve no purpose to you. On the contrary, if when reading this entry it strikes a chord, resonates, or causes you to reflect / introspect I recommend that you do not read it out of sequence nor consecutively (the conversations are progressive). Give it time to settle before moving onto the next.

The conversations take place within four days. However, adhering to the four days isn’t necessary. Though I do recommend that you read part two no sooner than the day after you read part one, and part three a day after part two (preferrably a few days). Upon completion, if you’d like … I am open to discuss it further. However, at the end of the series there will be links and other relevant information if you desire to pursue it independently. Anyway, I hope you at least enjoy the read. Later.

- Prasand J.

Segment: Security Explained … Thoroughly.

Session Start (Prasand J.:Ria Yoshida): Tue Nov 13 21:56:18 2007

[09:56:19 PM] Ria Yoshida: P~chyaaaaaan

[09:56:19 PM] *** Auto-response sent to Ria Yoshida: “The search for perfection ends the moment it begins.” -Prasand

[09:56:19 PM] Ria Yoshida: I gotta job!
[09:56:22 PM] Ria Yoshida: woooo hoooooooo
[09:56:27 PM] Ria Yoshida: and I looooooooove it!
[09:56:35 PM] Ria Yoshida: My boss’s name is [name removed]
[09:56:43 PM] Ria Yoshida: and I’m her little bitch
[09:56:44 PM] Ria Yoshida: :D
[09:56:50 PM] Ria Yoshida: check out the web site
[09:56:55 PM] Ria Yoshida: [url removed]
[09:57:00 PM] Ria Yoshida: that’s the company
[09:57:18 PM] Ria Yoshida: I’m the marketing Associates… [name removed] is the Marketing Director
[09:57:27 PM] Ria Yoshida: and I pretty much do everything
[09:57:53 PM] Ria Yoshida: probably start bring/drop dry cleaning and shiet :X lol
[09:58:04 PM] Ria Yoshida: but it’s coooooool… me happy happy joy joy
[09:59:06 PM] Ria Yoshida: t’s a luxury design firm so it’s a creative colorful fun artsy environment and I’m on the business aspects of it learning it all
[09:59:11 PM] Ria Yoshida: *it’s
[09:59:18 PM] Ria Yoshida: this is my dream job!
[09:59:43 PM] Ria Yoshida: either than that
[09:59:51 PM] Ria Yoshida: kind of going through withdrawl :X
[09:59:59 PM] Ria Yoshida: don’t deal with Henry anymore
[10:00:14 PM] Ria Yoshida: gave him the cra and cut all ties
[10:00:17 PM] Ria Yoshida: :P
[10:00:40 PM] Ria Yoshida: the withdrawl isn’t caused because of tha though
[10:00:53 PM] Ria Yoshida: don’t even really think about him lol :P
[10:01:04 PM] Ria Yoshida: it’s just meeeee… la la laaaaaaa
[10:01:27 PM] Ria Yoshida: sort of dealing with a new guy… just friends though
[10:01:33 PM] Ria Yoshida: eh…
[10:01:41 PM] Ria Yoshida: I’m not desperate
[10:01:54 PM] Ria Yoshida: and not a chick who needs to be in a relationship…!!!
[10:01:57 PM] Ria Yoshida: damn it!!! lol
[10:02:15 PM] Ria Yoshida: I just happen to have offers and happen to accept
[10:02:16 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:02:50 PM] Ria Yoshida: and been re-evaluating lots…
[10:03:16 PM] Ria Yoshida: well… just going through withdrawl I guess… :P
[10:03:20 PM] Ria Yoshida: I dunno….
[10:03:32 PM] Ria Yoshida: …..do you htink I’m a bad communicator?
[10:03:50 PM] Ria Yoshida: of course you understand me… but even than there are times when you don’t
[10:03:57 PM] Ria Yoshida: shiet… I don’t
[10:04:00 PM] Ria Yoshida: :D
[10:04:08 PM] Ria Yoshida: “Only Ria understand Ria”
[10:04:11 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:04:20 PM] Ria Yoshida: my Riatarded moments….
[10:04:31 PM] Ria Yoshida: is it being unfocused…. ?
[10:04:59 PM] Prasand J.: lol @ you’re her bitch
[10:04:59 PM] Ria Yoshida: I think I get carried away with people around me, I lose myself
[10:05:05 PM] Ria Yoshida: so to speak
[10:05:09 PM] Ria Yoshida: :D
[10:05:32 PM] Ria Yoshida: It’s great cause she’s my mentor and shiet
[10:05:45 PM] Prasand J.: gave him the “what”?
[10:05:58 PM] Ria Yoshida: she’s born 3 days after my mom… year is different of course… but her energy is like my mom so I get her
[10:06:26 PM] Ria Yoshida: gave him the car
[10:06:39 PM] Ria Yoshida: :/
[10:06:44 PM] Prasand J.: ah k
[10:07:06 PM] Ria Yoshida: I’m getting a new phone soon… as soon as I get paid and will probably change my number
[10:07:16 PM] Ria Yoshida: for fresh start so to speak… not that I really care
[10:07:25 PM] Ria Yoshida: i dunno
[10:07:37 PM] Prasand J.: ummm
[10:07:43 PM] Prasand J.: it’s not you being unfocused
[10:07:55 PM] Prasand J.: just careless
[10:08:24 PM] Ria Yoshida: I hurt those around me and myself when I’m careless.. hunh
[10:08:43 PM] Prasand J.: however, to go from being careless to careful … is something I cannot really advocate
[10:08:51 PM] Prasand J.: since doing so requires the person being afraid
[10:08:55 PM] Ria Yoshida: not think about consequences
[10:08:57 PM] Prasand J.: or becoming one who’s afraid
[10:09:03 PM] Prasand J.: there’s two types of careless people
[10:09:10 PM] Ria Yoshida: but i have fears laready lol
[10:09:17 PM] Prasand J.: those who are naive and thus secure because they are oblivious to the things which go on around them
[10:09:28 PM] Prasand J.: and those who are aware, but accept
[10:09:33 PM] Prasand J.: you’re the former
[10:09:36 PM] Prasand J.: I’m the latter
[10:09:43 PM] Prasand J.: like for example
[10:09:53 PM] Prasand J.: you don’t know half of the shit that flies in the air
[10:09:57 PM] Prasand J.: that we intake
[10:10:00 PM] Prasand J.: and as such
[10:10:06 PM] Prasand J.: are blissfully ignorant
[10:10:10 PM] Prasand J.: therefore do not care
[10:10:15 PM] Prasand J.: I however know
[10:10:19 PM] Prasand J.: and still don’t give a fuck
[10:11:01 PM] Ria Yoshida: the air? I just held my breathe :X
[10:11:08 PM] Prasand J.: lol
[10:11:14 PM] Ria Yoshida: what’s in it?????? am I gonna dieee?????
[10:11:17 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:11:27 PM] Ria Yoshida: :P
[10:11:39 PM] Ria Yoshida: I feel slightly lost
[10:11:52 PM] Ria Yoshida: Kind of sad these days
[10:12:01 PM] Ria Yoshida: but am still happy
[10:12:01 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:12:04 PM] Ria Yoshida: conflicted
[10:12:07 PM] Ria Yoshida: sort of
[10:12:39 PM] Ria Yoshida: Well…. I’m happy about a lot of things and poeple in my life…. my job and being accepted to Brooklyn college and starting in January
[10:12:49 PM] Ria Yoshida: weekends and night classes for my degree
[10:12:54 PM] Ria Yoshida: great
[10:13:13 PM] Ria Yoshida: but have an under lying part that has been in the dark
[10:13:47 PM] Ria Yoshida: I’m a naturally happy, naive, go lucky type…. but maybe pushed it beyond it’s moments
[10:13:56 PM] Ria Yoshida: used it to cover up my darker moments
[10:14:09 PM] Ria Yoshida: never faced my dark side :X
[10:14:10 PM] Ria Yoshida: ?
[10:14:19 PM] Ria Yoshida: and thus withdrawing…?
[10:14:34 PM] Ria Yoshida: needing to recharge… regress….
[10:14:49 PM] Ria Yoshida: I can’t even say it’s Henry
[10:15:05 PM] Ria Yoshida: but the emotional roller coaster ride I was on that’s got me here
[10:15:07 PM] Ria Yoshida: so to speak
[10:15:26 PM] Ria Yoshida: and dealing with a new guy that I’m unsure of
[10:15:36 PM] Ria Yoshida: I don’t need a man
[10:15:39 PM] Ria Yoshida: I just want one
[10:15:41 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:15:44 PM] Ria Yoshida: like having one
[10:15:52 PM] Prasand J.: delusion
[10:16:02 PM] Ria Yoshida: but I’d rather be alone than be in somehting fake again
[10:16:02 PM] Prasand J.: it’s fine in writing and theory
[10:16:04 PM] Ria Yoshida: I think
[10:16:07 PM] Prasand J.: but the truth is
[10:16:08 PM] Ria Yoshida: I hope… lol
[10:16:12 PM] Prasand J.: you subconsciously feel you need one
[10:16:23 PM] Prasand J.: regardless of what you try to mentally excuse
[10:16:31 PM] Ria Yoshida: probably
[10:16:50 PM] Ria Yoshida: what am I worth without having someone to mirror it back at me?
[10:16:51 PM] Ria Yoshida: ouch
[10:17:35 PM] Ria Yoshida: I find myself reaching for someone… anyone… at times when alone
[10:18:22 PM] Ria Yoshida: I don’t wanna neeeeeeeeeed
[10:18:43 PM] Ria Yoshida: why can’t I be there for myself the way I want someone else to?
[10:18:55 PM] Ria Yoshida: I can hug me and touch me and give me orgasms :)))))))
[10:19:07 PM] Ria Yoshida: I be just fine chilling
[10:19:19 PM] Ria Yoshida: until moments hit and…. I’m aloooooone
[10:19:29 PM] Ria Yoshida: but I felt alone with people too
[10:19:57 PM] Ria Yoshida: actually especially with people… but was preoccupied with whatever was going on that didn’t have refecting time to it
[10:20:03 PM] Ria Yoshida: *reflecting
[10:20:06 PM] Ria Yoshida: :/
[10:21:05 PM] Prasand J.: add stacy
[10:21:19 PM] Prasand J.: I hope you realize I don’t tell you things like that for no reason
[10:21:29 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:21:31 PM] Prasand J.: you need to learn to do what you’re told
[10:21:32 PM] Ria Yoshida: I know
[10:21:35 PM] Prasand J.: it’s annoying
[10:21:42 PM] Ria Yoshida: bla bla bla
[10:21:51 PM] Prasand J.: all of that is your ego btw
[10:21:56 PM] Prasand J.: your inability to do what you’re told
[10:21:58 PM] Ria Yoshida: you know how Taurus’ react when they’re told what to do
[10:22:01 PM] Prasand J.: your moments of feeling alone
[10:22:05 PM] Prasand J.: all of that is ego
[10:22:21 PM] Ria Yoshida: ego?
[10:22:24 PM] Ria Yoshida: ok…?
[10:22:26 PM] Prasand J.: ego is one’s perception of self separate from others
[10:22:29 PM] Prasand J.: it’s their identity
[10:22:35 PM] Prasand J.: it’s the division of all things
[10:22:36 PM] Prasand J.: and thus
[10:22:40 PM] Prasand J.: the cause of all wars
[10:22:44 PM] Prasand J.: it’s the opposite of unity
[10:22:46 PM] Prasand J.: therefore
[10:22:50 PM] Prasand J.: the more lonely a person is
[10:22:58 PM] Prasand J.: the less community oriented they are
[10:23:04 PM] Prasand J.: the more egotistical they are
[10:23:11 PM] Prasand J.: ego is the product of insecurity
[10:23:16 PM] Ria Yoshida: I feel close to people al of a sudden
[10:23:17 PM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[10:23:26 PM] Ria Yoshida: *let go of ego*
[10:23:33 PM] Ria Yoshida: *let go of thy ego*
[10:23:35 PM] Prasand J.: easier said than done
[10:23:40 PM] Ria Yoshida: i know
[10:23:43 PM] Ria Yoshida: :)
[10:23:49 PM] Ria Yoshida: but it’s nice to read the words
[10:23:59 PM] Ria Yoshida: they compute to the brain
[10:24:04 PM] Ria Yoshida: and have a chain reaction
[10:24:10 PM] Prasand J.: for example … all of my fighting, was egotistical
[10:24:13 PM] Ria Yoshida: maybe not practiced fully
[10:24:21 PM] Prasand J.: any form of resistance is egotistical
[10:24:37 PM] Ria Yoshida: but what if the other person is pushing?
[10:24:41 PM] Ria Yoshida: just let them?
[10:24:50 PM] Ria Yoshida: what if it doesn’t feel right?
[10:24:56 PM] Prasand J.: well the decision on what one does is a matter of preference
[10:25:01 PM] Prasand J.: there is no right nor wrong
[10:25:09 PM] Ria Yoshida: where does ummm
[10:25:14 PM] Ria Yoshida: what’s the word?
[10:25:16 PM] Prasand J.: it’s all in merely acknowledging what you want to do
[10:25:21 PM] Ria Yoshida: intuition come in?
[10:25:22 PM] Prasand J.: shut up and listen
[10:25:24 PM] Prasand J.: smh
[10:25:32 PM] Prasand J.: your brain is all over the place and you’re not really listening
[10:25:44 PM] Prasand J.: therefore you’re not really absorbing anything
[10:25:55 PM] Prasand J.: I’m not typing to waste my time
[10:25:59 PM] Ria Yoshida: I read…. but I’m sharing
[10:26:08 PM] Prasand J.: I don’t care
[10:26:12 PM] Prasand J.: seriously
[10:26:32 PM] Ria Yoshida: care about what?
[10:26:40 PM] Prasand J.: what you have to say in response
[10:26:44 PM] Prasand J.: I don’t want to hear it
[10:27:03 PM] Prasand J.: if you hit me up to vent
[10:27:08 PM] Prasand J.: go somewhere else
[10:27:11 PM] Prasand J.: and don’t waste my time
[10:27:18 PM] Prasand J.: if you hit me up for answers
[10:27:21 PM] Prasand J.: shut up and listen
[10:27:30 PM] Ria Yoshida: k
[10:27:38 PM] Prasand J.: which did you do?
[10:27:44 PM] Ria Yoshida: speak please :)
[10:28:03 PM] Ria Yoshida: which did I do?
[10:28:21 PM] Prasand J.: I meant did you hit me up to vent, or did you hit me up for answers / solutions?
[10:28:25 PM] Prasand J.: but your speak please
[10:28:29 PM] Prasand J.: answered that
[10:28:55 PM] Ria Yoshida: k
[10:29:08 PM] Prasand J.: right, wrong, good, bad, better, worse
[10:29:12 PM] Prasand J.: are all relative concepts
[10:29:14 PM] Prasand J.: therefore
[10:29:19 PM] Prasand J.: are never absolute
[10:29:30 PM] Prasand J.: anytime you perceive something to be right, good, better
[10:29:32 PM] Prasand J.: it’s always
[10:29:39 PM] Prasand J.: wrong, bad, and worse
[10:29:42 PM] Prasand J.: at all times
[10:29:55 PM] Prasand J.: people want to be right, good, or better
[10:30:01 PM] Prasand J.: but are not willing to see
[10:30:08 PM] Prasand J.: how they are wrong, bad, or worse
[10:30:12 PM] Prasand J.: because they are egotistical
[10:30:21 PM] Prasand J.: and want to perceive themselves as above others
[10:30:26 PM] Prasand J.: better than others
[10:30:34 PM] Prasand J.: because they are truly insecure
[10:30:35 PM] Prasand J.: therefore
[10:30:43 PM] Prasand J.: your questions of what if it feels wrong
[10:30:46 PM] Prasand J.: pointless
[10:30:53 PM] Prasand J.: and it’s just your insecurities playing with you
[10:30:58 PM] Prasand J.: because of your uncertainty
[10:31:04 PM] Prasand J.: the entertaining of such thoughts
[10:31:09 PM] Prasand J.: really just makes matters worse
[10:31:29 PM] Prasand J.: the debation of what’s write or wrong
[10:31:36 PM] Prasand J.: is purely egotistical, and an argument of insecurity
[10:31:38 PM] Prasand J.: at all times
[10:31:48 PM] Prasand J.: two people forcing their perception of what’s right upon the other
[10:31:56 PM] Prasand J.: it’s things like that which is why wars exist
[10:32:04 PM] Prasand J.: people destroy life in the process of it
[10:32:10 PM] Prasand J.: that is not right nor wrong
[10:32:14 PM] Prasand J.: it’s just what happens
[10:32:16 PM] Prasand J.: the truth
[10:32:20 PM] Prasand J.: in the end
[10:32:24 PM] Prasand J.: the acceptance of truth
[10:32:29 PM] Prasand J.: without ridicule
[10:32:34 PM] Prasand J.: is the only way to be secure
[10:32:35 PM] Prasand J.: still
[10:32:37 PM] Prasand J.: calm
[10:32:40 PM] Prasand J.: tranquil
[10:32:44 PM] Prasand J.: it’s the only way to love
[10:32:48 PM] Prasand J.: and not reject others
[10:32:55 PM] Prasand J.: however, that’s another story
[10:33:10 PM] Prasand J.: after
[10:33:13 PM] Prasand J.: one sees
[10:33:19 PM] Prasand J.: how all things right are wrong
[10:33:24 PM] Prasand J.: and truly believes it
[10:33:27 PM] Prasand J.: they’ll see that
[10:33:34 PM] Prasand J.: it all comes down to a matter of preference
[10:33:43 PM] Prasand J.: you have preferences
[10:33:47 PM] Prasand J.: I have preferences
[10:33:50 PM] Prasand J.: everyone does
[10:33:58 PM] Prasand J.: and one’s preferences aren’t better than another’s
[10:34:05 PM] Prasand J.: just because I choose not to rape people
[10:34:07 PM] Prasand J.: doesn’t mean
[10:34:17 PM] Prasand J.: my preferences are better than a man’s who does rape people
[10:34:24 PM] Prasand J.: I can understand why he does it
[10:34:31 PM] Prasand J.: people can’t justify such actions
[10:34:35 PM] Prasand J.: because they are too busy
[10:34:40 PM] Prasand J.: holding onto their identity
[10:34:51 PM] Prasand J.: believing that their perception of things
[10:34:54 PM] Prasand J.: is absolutely right
[10:34:59 PM] Prasand J.: the fact of the matter is
[10:35:09 PM] Prasand J.: things like “rape” are natually justified
[10:35:11 PM] Prasand J.: for example
[10:35:15 PM] Prasand J.: there’s many kinds of rape
[10:35:19 PM] Prasand J.: not just sexual
[10:35:22 PM] Prasand J.: and in all other cases
[10:35:30 PM] Prasand J.: if it’s not sexual rape is accepted
[10:35:37 PM] Prasand J.: that’s hypocritical socially
[10:35:41 PM] Prasand J.: to say rape is okay
[10:35:48 PM] Prasand J.: but then say it’s not in “one” case out of many
[10:35:57 PM] Prasand J.: the reason why people perceive it to not be okay
[10:36:02 PM] Prasand J.: ironically is also because of ego
[10:36:05 PM] Prasand J.: they think about the pain
[10:36:08 PM] Prasand J.: they cause others
[10:36:16 PM] Prasand J.: or others experience in the process
[10:36:30 PM] Prasand J.: without acknowledging nor owning up to the myriad of other ways they cause people pain
[10:36:34 PM] Prasand J.: people are half-assed
[10:36:45 PM] Prasand J.: they say that … that pain is wrong
[10:36:51 PM] Prasand J.: but the other pain they cause is right
[10:36:56 PM] Prasand J.: people are confused
[10:37:03 PM] Prasand J.: the fact is
[10:37:07 PM] Prasand J.: rape is very base
[10:37:10 PM] Prasand J.: it’s very natural
[10:37:16 PM] Prasand J.: for animals to dominate one another
[10:37:20 PM] Prasand J.: against the other’s will
[10:37:29 PM] Prasand J.: remove all of the laws
[10:37:35 PM] Prasand J.: and perceptions people have about it
[10:37:38 PM] Prasand J.: because of equality
[10:37:43 PM] Prasand J.: and women’s rights
[10:37:50 PM] Prasand J.: and all of the advances of society
[10:37:53 PM] Prasand J.: and one will see
[10:37:56 PM] Prasand J.: that things like rape
[10:38:01 PM] Prasand J.: wouldn’t actually bother people
[10:38:05 PM] Prasand J.: it only bothers people
[10:38:15 PM] Prasand J.: because of how egotistical our society has become
[10:38:19 PM] Prasand J.: how insecure the world gets
[10:38:23 PM] Prasand J.: with each passing day
[10:38:29 PM] Prasand J.: the fact is
[10:38:35 PM] Prasand J.: women “WANT” to be dominated
[10:38:38 PM] Prasand J.: but the problem is
[10:38:46 PM] Prasand J.: they only want to be dominated by whom they choose
[10:38:58 PM] Prasand J.: our society is addicted to choice
[10:39:07 PM] Prasand J.: focused on their pleasure
[10:39:09 PM] Prasand J.: selfishly
[10:39:19 PM] Prasand J.: all of that was to illustrate
[10:39:25 PM] Prasand J.: no matter how extreme the situation
[10:39:28 PM] Prasand J.: may seem
[10:39:32 PM] Prasand J.: that one cannot justify
[10:39:36 PM] Prasand J.: how “right” it is
[10:39:43 PM] Prasand J.: it truly “can” be justified
[10:39:48 PM] Prasand J.: even murder
[10:40:01 PM] Prasand J.: “everything” right is wrong and vice-versa
[10:40:04 PM] Prasand J.: at all times
[10:40:06 PM] Prasand J.: it’s all about
[10:40:15 PM] Prasand J.: does one want to perceive how it’s right
[10:40:20 PM] Prasand J.: most people do not
[10:40:26 PM] Prasand J.: they are blind to the other side of the story
[10:40:32 PM] Prasand J.: because they are so insecure
[10:40:42 PM] Prasand J.: that they do not know how to function
[10:40:45 PM] Prasand J.: while accepting
[10:40:49 PM] Prasand J.: that they are always wrong
[10:40:56 PM] Prasand J.: they are so self-righteous
[10:41:03 PM] Prasand J.: such pride
[10:41:08 PM] Prasand J.: makes them feel better about themselves
[10:41:13 PM] Prasand J.: because the truth is
[10:41:17 PM] Prasand J.: they really feel like shit
[10:41:22 PM] Prasand J.: so they “need” things like that
[10:41:26 PM] Prasand J.: in order to feel good
[10:41:41 PM] Prasand J.: take away those things
[10:41:48 PM] Prasand J.: and one begins to understand
[10:41:56 PM] Prasand J.: how they really perceive themselves
[10:42:17 PM] Prasand J.: after realizing that there is no right nor wrong
[10:42:21 PM] Prasand J.: there is no good nor bad
[10:42:26 PM] Prasand J.: there’s merely preference
[10:42:34 PM] Prasand J.: one must decide clearly
[10:42:37 PM] Prasand J.: what they prefer
[10:42:44 PM] Prasand J.: and gain an understanding of who they are
[10:42:49 PM] Prasand J.: and accept themselves
[10:42:54 PM] Prasand J.: without ridicule
[10:43:10 PM] Prasand J.: “just because I prefer that, doesn’t make me a bad person … it’s just who I am, and that’s okay”
[10:43:27 PM] Prasand J.: the more one can accept themselves without ridicule
[10:43:36 PM] Prasand J.: the more secure they become
[10:43:43 PM] Prasand J.: then the more they can accept themselves
[10:43:48 PM] Prasand J.: the more they can accept others
[10:43:50 PM] Prasand J.: and reality
[10:43:55 PM] Prasand J.: since to dream
[10:44:02 PM] Prasand J.: is to merely be discontent with what exists
[10:44:11 PM] Prasand J.: so we dream of something better, worse, or different
[10:44:18 PM] Prasand J.: since we’re not satisfied
[10:44:24 PM] Prasand J.: to accept things as they are
[10:44:27 PM] Prasand J.: is to be satisfied
[10:44:29 PM] Prasand J.: to be still
[10:44:35 PM] Prasand J.: some would call it “settling”
[10:44:39 PM] Prasand J.: which our egotistical
[10:44:40 PM] Prasand J.: society
[10:44:47 PM] Prasand J.: is completely against
[10:44:58 PM] Prasand J.: funny that socially we’re against all forms of tranquility
[10:45:02 PM] Prasand J.: and seek war
[10:45:11 PM] Prasand J.: we seek to fight
[10:45:17 PM] Prasand J.: thinking that’s the way to live
[10:45:24 PM] Prasand J.: when it’s really just the way to die
[10:45:42 PM] Prasand J.: it’s just that some are strong
[10:45:46 PM] Prasand J.: and happen to survive
[10:45:51 PM] Prasand J.: the way I lived my life
[10:45:57 PM] Prasand J.: was because I really had a death wish
[10:46:10 PM] Prasand J.: hence why I do not fear the things that most people do
[10:46:27 PM] Prasand J.: dreams
[10:46:30 PM] Prasand J.: are destructive
[10:46:36 PM] Prasand J.: we create false perceptions
[10:46:44 PM] Prasand J.: things which are imaginary
[10:46:48 PM] Prasand J.: and do not allow ourselves
[10:46:53 PM] Prasand J.: to appreciate what exists
[10:46:57 PM] Prasand J.: we do not allow ourselves
[10:46:59 PM] Prasand J.: to truly be happy
[10:47:01 PM] Prasand J.: in the moment
[10:47:10 PM] Prasand J.: since we’re feeding false realities
[10:47:20 PM] Prasand J.: not even perceiving what’s really there
[10:47:33 PM] Prasand J.: the more a person dreams
[10:47:40 PM] Prasand J.: the more they are discontent with reality
[10:47:49 PM] Prasand J.: the less able they are to accept things
[10:47:55 PM] Prasand J.: the more egotistical they are
[10:47:57 PM] Prasand J.: selfish they are
[10:47:59 PM] Prasand J.: etc
[10:48:04 PM] Prasand J.: this does not mean
[10:48:06 PM] Prasand J.: they are wrong
[10:48:08 PM] Prasand J.: they are bad
[10:48:11 PM] Prasand J.: it just means
[10:48:13 PM] Prasand J.: they are selfish
[10:48:16 PM] Prasand J.: they are egotistical
[10:48:22 PM] Prasand J.: selfish people are needed in the world
[10:48:26 PM] Prasand J.: a role is a role
[10:48:29 PM] Prasand J.: however
[10:48:35 PM] Prasand J.: after understanding one’s role
[10:48:41 PM] Prasand J.: they must clearly decide
[10:48:46 PM] Prasand J.: “but is that what I want?”
[10:49:01 PM] Prasand J.: it’s only when one faces the truth that they can decide clearly
[10:49:11 PM] Prasand J.: everything we desire has a conflict
[10:49:13 PM] Prasand J.: at all times
[10:49:23 PM] Prasand J.: the winner is the one that will be acted upon
[10:49:32 PM] Prasand J.: “I wanted to call you, but I was busy at work”
[10:49:42 PM] Prasand J.: the statement is true
[10:49:47 PM] Prasand J.: but it’s not the truth
[10:49:52 PM] Prasand J.: the truth is
[10:49:57 PM] Prasand J.: although they wanted to call the person
[10:50:06 PM] Prasand J.: they really wanted to work more than they wanted to call the person
[10:50:12 PM] Prasand J.: they found their work to be more important
[10:50:13 PM] Prasand J.: but
[10:50:20 PM] Prasand J.: they won’t actually say that to the person
[10:50:26 PM] Prasand J.: and people are fine with being misled
[10:50:35 PM] Prasand J.: they like to be fed the dream
[10:50:38 PM] Prasand J.: or the perception
[10:50:43 PM] Prasand J.: “he wanted to call me”
[10:50:48 PM] Prasand J.: but the reality is
[10:50:50 PM] Prasand J.: he really didn’t
[10:50:55 PM] Prasand J.: he only “slightly” wanted to
[10:50:58 PM] Prasand J.: less than 50%
[10:51:04 PM] Prasand J.: since action is 51% desire
[10:51:17 PM] Prasand J.: the difference between action and inaction is 51%
[10:51:19 PM] Prasand J.: at worse
[10:51:31 PM] Prasand J.: therefore a 1% shift is all that’s ever really needed
[10:51:32 PM] Prasand J.: however
[10:51:38 PM] Prasand J.: one must admit to themselves
[10:51:39 PM] Prasand J.: the truth
[10:51:45 PM] Prasand J.: one must be willing to see the truth
[10:51:49 PM] Prasand J.: in order to decide clearly
[10:51:59 PM] Prasand J.: “I want to call her, but I want to work”
[10:52:09 PM] Prasand J.: it’s only when they see the conflict can they clearly decide
[10:52:19 PM] Prasand J.: “which do I really want to do, which is more important to me?”
[10:52:23 PM] Prasand J.: and “if”
[10:52:31 PM] Prasand J.: that person normally would’ve worked without thought
[10:52:34 PM] Prasand J.: maybe in that second
[10:52:38 PM] Prasand J.: when they decide clearly
[10:52:41 PM] Prasand J.: what’s more important to them
[10:52:45 PM] Prasand J.: they will find the will
[10:52:49 PM] Prasand J.: to actually call the person
[10:52:54 PM] Prasand J.: irrespective of the consequences
[10:52:56 PM] Prasand J.: without fear
[10:52:58 PM] Prasand J.: and it is then
[10:53:01 PM] Prasand J.: and only then
[10:53:05 PM] Prasand J.: when a person decides clearly
[10:53:07 PM] Prasand J.: what they want
[10:53:11 PM] Prasand J.: are they satisfied
[10:53:14 PM] Prasand J.: with the outcome
[10:53:18 PM] Prasand J.: whatever that may be
[10:53:23 PM] Prasand J.: since they decided clearly
[10:53:30 PM] Prasand J.: regardless of what happens
[10:53:45 PM] Prasand J.: that’s security in action
[10:53:50 PM] Prasand J.: security in choices
[10:53:58 PM] Prasand J.: there’s security in oneself
[10:54:05 PM] Prasand J.: all of those things are related
[10:54:10 PM] Prasand J.: for in accepting the things we do
[10:54:15 PM] Prasand J.: we also accept ourselves
[10:54:24 PM] Prasand J.: but the only way to do it is to face the truth
[10:54:26 PM] Prasand J.: about ourselves
[10:54:28 PM] Prasand J.: our choices
[10:54:30 PM] Prasand J.: life
[10:54:32 PM] Prasand J.: the world
[10:54:39 PM] Prasand J.: without ridicule
[10:54:42 PM] Prasand J.: without fear
[10:54:53 PM] Prasand J.: the more confident one becomes
[10:54:55 PM] Prasand J.: ironically
[10:55:02 PM] Prasand J.: the more indifferent about things they become
[10:55:13 PM] Prasand J.: since they understand that everything’s a matter of preference
[10:55:20 PM] Prasand J.: things no longer bother them as much
[10:55:23 PM] Prasand J.: “it’s cool”
[10:55:36 PM] Prasand J.: the funny thing about accepting others is
[10:55:41 PM] Prasand J.: we have to become indifferent
[10:55:47 PM] Prasand J.: therefore the irony
[10:55:48 PM] Prasand J.: is
[10:55:59 PM] Prasand J.: those we show we love more
[10:56:05 PM] Prasand J.: are those we become indifferent about
[10:56:10 PM] Prasand J.: but still care about
[10:56:16 PM] Prasand J.: for example
[10:56:20 PM] Prasand J.: allowing you to be yourself
[10:56:23 PM] Prasand J.: and not judging you
[10:56:29 PM] Prasand J.: the more I am able to do that
[10:56:34 PM] Prasand J.: the more I am able to love you
[10:56:47 PM] Prasand J.: however
[10:56:52 PM] Prasand J.: we don’t do that
[10:56:57 PM] Prasand J.: because we hold onto ourselves
[10:57:00 PM] Prasand J.: in those moments
[10:57:02 PM] Prasand J.: which
[10:57:13 PM] Prasand J.: is purely insecure of us to do
[10:57:20 PM] Prasand J.: see … I used to be a person
[10:57:26 PM] Prasand J.: who advocated who I was
[10:57:28 PM] Prasand J.: what I was about
[10:57:35 PM] Prasand J.: and all of the myriad of other bullshit things
[10:57:41 PM] Prasand J.: that I proclaimed
[10:57:49 PM] Prasand J.: all of that was insecurity
[10:57:52 PM] Prasand J.: since the truth is
[10:58:01 PM] Prasand J.: anyone who must hold onto who they are
[10:58:05 PM] Prasand J.: isn’t sure who they are
[10:58:08 PM] Prasand J.: the very action
[10:58:11 PM] Prasand J.: of “holding onto” it
[10:58:15 PM] Prasand J.: proves insecurity
[10:58:27 PM] Prasand J.: so anyone
[10:58:33 PM] Prasand J.: who advocates their identity
[10:58:36 PM] Prasand J.: things such as
[10:58:39 PM] Prasand J.: be original
[10:58:46 PM] Prasand J.: or talks about individuality
[10:58:50 PM] Prasand J.: the more we do it
[10:58:54 PM] Prasand J.: the more insecure we are
[10:58:58 PM] Prasand J.: the more afraid we are
[10:59:05 PM] Prasand J.: blah blah blah
[10:59:13 PM] Prasand J.: here’s true security
[10:59:22 PM] Prasand J.: indifference == being unmoved
[10:59:28 PM] Prasand J.: a truly secure person
[10:59:33 PM] Prasand J.: who’s confident in who they are
[10:59:36 PM] Prasand J.: understands
[10:59:40 PM] Prasand J.: that regardless of what they do
[10:59:44 PM] Prasand J.: it will not change who they are
[10:59:48 PM] Prasand J.: a single action
[10:59:52 PM] Prasand J.: even if against their beliefs
[10:59:57 PM] Prasand J.: does not make nor break who they are
[11:00:03 PM] Prasand J.: you’re vegetarian?
[11:00:05 PM] Prasand J.: yeah
[11:00:10 PM] Prasand J.: you can still be vegetarian
[11:00:16 PM] Prasand J.: even if you eat meat today
[11:00:19 PM] Prasand J.: a single day
[11:00:21 PM] Prasand J.: does not erase
[11:00:26 PM] Prasand J.: all of the myriads of days
[11:00:28 PM] Prasand J.: that came before it
[11:00:33 PM] Prasand J.: nor the days that came after it
[11:00:34 PM] Prasand J.: however
[11:00:36 PM] Prasand J.: in our minds
[11:00:40 PM] Prasand J.: it’s human nature
[11:00:48 PM] Prasand J.: that a single “bad” or “wrong” action
[11:00:57 PM] Prasand J.: erases all of the “good” or “right” which preceded it
[11:01:05 PM] Prasand J.: I can do a million things for you which are right
[11:01:08 PM] Prasand J.: but the moment I fuck up
[11:01:16 PM] Prasand J.: all of those things will be erased
[11:01:23 PM] Prasand J.: because our brains are broken
[11:01:30 PM] Prasand J.: we focus on the negative
[11:01:38 PM] Prasand J.: when “reality” dictates otherwise
[11:01:42 PM] Prasand J.: the reality is
[11:01:57 PM] Prasand J.: a single action cannot erase thousands of others the exist
[11:01:59 PM] Prasand J.: prior to it
[11:02:01 PM] Prasand J.: and after it
[11:02:03 PM] Prasand J.: as such
[11:02:08 PM] Prasand J.: a truly secure person
[11:02:09 PM] Prasand J.: will say
[11:02:15 PM] Prasand J.: I may be vegetarian
[11:02:25 PM] Prasand J.: but it won’t kill me to eat meat today
[11:02:32 PM] Prasand J.: it won’t change who i am as a person
[11:02:40 PM] Prasand J.: there’s something potent in that action
[11:02:47 PM] Prasand J.: for the more secure we become
[11:02:52 PM] Prasand J.: the more indifferent about ourselves
[11:02:56 PM] Prasand J.: and what we want
[11:02:58 PM] Prasand J.: we become
[11:03:04 PM] Prasand J.: such a person
[11:03:13 PM] Prasand J.: understands their preferences
[11:03:17 PM] Prasand J.: but is indifferent about
[11:03:20 PM] Prasand J.: getting what they want
[11:03:22 PM] Prasand J.: or not
[11:03:30 PM] Prasand J.: no matter what they are doing
[11:03:34 PM] Prasand J.: where they are
[11:03:36 PM] Prasand J.: who they are with
[11:03:39 PM] Prasand J.: they are steady
[11:03:42 PM] Prasand J.: consistent
[11:03:44 PM] Prasand J.: unmoved
[11:03:48 PM] Prasand J.: “secure”
[11:03:52 PM] Prasand J.: in who they are
[11:03:54 PM] Prasand J.: where they are
[11:04:00 PM] Prasand J.: they are never uncomfortable
[11:04:03 PM] Prasand J.: never conflicted
[11:04:21 PM] Prasand J.: that’s true security
[11:04:24 PM] Prasand J.: indifference
[11:04:33 PM] Prasand J.: as such
[11:04:37 PM] Prasand J.: I can want something for you
[11:04:45 PM] Prasand J.: but if you don’t want it
[11:04:47 PM] Prasand J.: it’s cool
[11:04:53 PM] Prasand J.: you since your brain is broken
[11:04:56 PM] Prasand J.: translate that into
[11:05:01 PM] Prasand J.: “you care only because I care”
[11:05:09 PM] Prasand J.: or my actions are based upon you
[11:05:14 PM] Prasand J.: but that’s far from the truth
[11:05:18 PM] Prasand J.: I’m just accepting
[11:05:19 PM] Prasand J.: loving
[11:05:25 PM] Prasand J.: choosing not to fight you
[11:05:31 PM] Prasand J.: and you just happen to be used to fighting
[11:05:38 PM] Prasand J.: to such an extent that you expect it
[11:05:45 PM] Prasand J.: you’re used to insecurity
[11:06:07 PM] Prasand J.: the more secure we become
[11:06:12 PM] Prasand J.: the less we focus on ourselves
[11:06:21 PM] Prasand J.: and start focusing on “us” “we”, etc
[11:06:35 PM] Prasand J.: everytime we feel alone
[11:06:38 PM] Prasand J.: it’s egotistical
[11:06:57 PM] Prasand J.: as such
[11:07:00 PM] Prasand J.: because of that
[11:07:04 PM] Prasand J.: the more secure we are
[11:07:06 PM] Prasand J.: ironically
[11:07:14 PM] Prasand J.: the easier and more prone we are to make others happy
[11:07:16 PM] Prasand J.: as well as
[11:07:20 PM] Prasand J.: being happy ourselves
[11:07:23 PM] Prasand J.: being able to accept
[11:07:26 PM] Prasand J.: and appreciate things
[11:07:27 PM] Prasand J.: even if
[11:07:36 PM] Prasand J.: it’s something that we may not have wanted to happen
[11:07:40 PM] Prasand J.: being able to accept reality
[11:07:42 PM] Prasand J.: is potent
[11:07:49 PM] Prasand J.: I may not want to fight you
[11:07:55 PM] Prasand J.: but if we fight, it’s cool
[11:07:59 PM] Prasand J.: I’ll enjoy the fight
[11:08:04 PM] Prasand J.: I won’t think of things like
[11:08:11 PM] Prasand J.: “but if you beat her up, that’s not cool”
[11:08:12 PM] Prasand J.: nah
[11:08:16 PM] Prasand J.: I’ll beat the shit out of you
[11:08:18 PM] Prasand J.: if we fight
[11:08:24 PM] Prasand J.: cause
[11:08:27 PM] Prasand J.: I’ll enjoy the fight
[11:08:32 PM] Prasand J.: I’ll enjoy anything
[11:08:36 PM] Prasand J.: and everything that happens
[11:08:39 PM] Prasand J.: as it happens
[11:08:45 PM] Prasand J.: even if it conflicts with my preferences
[11:09:01 PM] Prasand J.: it’s the only way to be happy and satisfied at all times
[11:09:06 PM] Prasand J.: we cause ourselves turmoil
[11:09:12 PM] Prasand J.: because of how we deal with things
[11:09:16 PM] Prasand J.: how we judge them
[11:09:18 PM] Prasand J.: this is wrong
[11:09:20 PM] Prasand J.: this is right
[11:09:22 PM] Prasand J.: I shouldn’t be
[11:09:24 PM] Prasand J.: blah blah blah
[11:09:28 PM] Prasand J.: fuck all of that
[11:09:34 PM] Prasand J.: however
[11:09:39 PM] Prasand J.: there’s a process
[11:09:55 PM] Prasand J.: to be able to reach the point where one is satisfied
[11:10:06 PM] Prasand J.: you can’t just apply everything I said randomly
[11:10:11 PM] Prasand J.: and expect it to work
[11:10:20 PM] Prasand J.: you must first be able to perceive the truth about things
[11:10:24 PM] Prasand J.: about yourself
[11:10:26 PM] Prasand J.: others
[11:10:27 PM] Prasand J.: etc
[11:10:33 PM] Prasand J.: you must first have the will
[11:10:36 PM] Prasand J.: and true desire to do it
[11:10:40 PM] Prasand J.: and follow through
[11:10:45 PM] Prasand J.: til completion
[11:10:56 PM] Prasand J.: half-assed attempts will get half-assed results
[11:11:18 PM] Prasand J.: when you perceive the conflict of choices
[11:11:22 PM] Prasand J.: and decide clearly
[11:11:25 PM] Prasand J.: what do you want
[11:11:28 PM] Prasand J.: what’s more important to you
[11:11:36 PM] Prasand J.: you’ll carve your preferences clearly
[11:11:45 PM] Prasand J.: and get a better understanding of yourself
[11:12:21 PM] Prasand J.: overcoming our ego is the hardest lesson to learn
[11:12:24 PM] Prasand J.: and scariest
[11:12:28 PM] Prasand J.: because
[11:12:32 PM] Prasand J.: it’s truly mental suicide
[11:12:38 PM] Prasand J.: it’s identity suicide
[11:12:48 PM] Prasand J.: and after all things are lost
[11:12:52 PM] Prasand J.: all we have is ourselves
[11:12:53 PM] Prasand J.: as such
[11:12:56 PM] Prasand J.: our identity
[11:12:59 PM] Prasand J.: is what we pride
[11:13:04 PM] Prasand J.: the very last thing we value
[11:13:14 PM] Prasand J.: it’s both the first and last thing we value
[11:13:26 PM] Prasand J.: to overcome our ego is to let go of the one thing which is most important to us
[11:13:38 PM] Prasand J.: I had two things which were most important
[11:13:51 PM] Prasand J.: my dream of the woman I was going to marry
[11:13:58 PM] Prasand J.: the one that I searched my whole life for
[11:14:03 PM] Prasand J.: and after that was taken away
[11:14:07 PM] Prasand J.: I thought I had nothing
[11:14:09 PM] Prasand J.: but the truth is
[11:14:15 PM] Prasand J.: I still had myself
[11:14:22 PM] Prasand J.: and it wasn’t until I was able to lose myself
[11:14:29 PM] Prasand J.: that I was able to truly find myself
[11:14:39 PM] Prasand J.: it was when I truly lost everything
[11:15:06 PM] Prasand J.: it is when we are able to perceive preferences clearly
[11:15:13 PM] Prasand J.: that life becomes what we make it
[11:15:24 PM] Prasand J.: and we’re able to dream in a very different way
[11:15:30 PM] Prasand J.: dreaming which does not conflict with
[11:15:34 PM] Prasand J.: nor discard reality
[11:15:49 PM] Prasand J.: dreaming which concides with reality
[11:15:54 PM] Prasand J.: for dreaming isn’t bad
[11:15:59 PM] Prasand J.: dreaming is only problematic
[11:16:04 PM] Prasand J.: when it conflicts with what is
[11:16:09 PM] Prasand J.: for it’s when that happens
[11:16:13 PM] Prasand J.: that we experience pain
[11:16:17 PM] Prasand J.: because of dreams
[11:16:21 PM] Prasand J.: when reality proves to us
[11:16:28 PM] Prasand J.: that things aren’t the way we perceived them to be
[11:16:49 PM] Prasand J.: I am able to dream in a different light now
[11:17:17 PM] Prasand J.: however, I have not completely gotten over my ego
[11:17:24 PM] Prasand J.: also
[11:17:33 PM] Prasand J.: when understanding that things are not right nor wrong
[11:17:37 PM] Prasand J.: just a matter of preference
[11:17:46 PM] Prasand J.: one accepts things like
[11:17:54 PM] Prasand J.: “it’s okay to not love everyone completely”
[11:18:06 PM] Prasand J.: “it’s okay that we don’t mesh perfectly”
[11:18:13 PM] Prasand J.: “if we were meant to, then we would”
[11:18:20 PM] Prasand J.: as such
[11:18:29 PM] Prasand J.: I do not believe one should truly let go of their ego entirely
[11:18:35 PM] Prasand J.: for what’s natural is not wrong
[11:18:37 PM] Prasand J.: and naturally
[11:18:42 PM] Prasand J.: we are drawn to certain people
[11:18:48 PM] Prasand J.: and do not acknowledge others
[11:18:50 PM] Prasand J.: for example
[11:18:52 PM] Prasand J.: children
[11:18:59 PM] Prasand J.: are very sensitive to each other’s energy
[11:19:08 PM] Prasand J.: a child will ignore most other children
[11:19:15 PM] Prasand J.: as they are stuck in their own world
[11:19:20 PM] Prasand J.: but the moment they connect with another child
[11:19:25 PM] Prasand J.: the two children will interact
[11:19:32 PM] Prasand J.: like they’ve known each other all their lives
[11:19:38 PM] Prasand J.: just the same as
[11:19:45 PM] Prasand J.: children do not like to be held by certain people
[11:19:52 PM] Prasand J.: because their energy does not mesh well
[11:19:58 PM] Prasand J.: we are taught by confused parents
[11:20:03 PM] Prasand J.: that we should be nice to everyone
[11:20:10 PM] Prasand J.: that we should conform to everyone
[11:20:14 PM] Prasand J.: that’s bullshit
[11:20:21 PM] Prasand J.: nature dictates otherwise
[11:20:35 PM] Prasand J.: so we seek to be accepted
[11:20:43 PM] Prasand J.: by people who shouldn’t really accept us
[11:20:47 PM] Prasand J.: we play the role
[11:20:52 PM] Prasand J.: lie to people about who we are
[11:20:58 PM] Prasand J.: cause we’re afraid of being rejected
[11:21:08 PM] Prasand J.: etc, etc
[11:21:10 PM] Prasand J.: paranoia
[11:21:12 PM] Prasand J.: fear
[11:21:15 PM] Prasand J.: ego
[11:21:44 PM] Prasand J.: it’s okay that we don’t mesh with certain people
[11:21:49 PM] Prasand J.: that’s the way it should be
[11:22:08 PM] Prasand J.: the acceptance of reality has potent results
[11:22:49 PM] Prasand J.: there is a division in identity
[11:22:56 PM] Prasand J.: previously i advocated
[11:22:59 PM] Prasand J.: that I was a fighter
[11:23:03 PM] Prasand J.: those are the division
[11:23:09 PM] Prasand J.: the lover versus the fighter
[11:23:17 PM] Prasand J.: when you see your preferences
[11:23:22 PM] Prasand J.: you will conflict
[11:23:25 PM] Prasand J.: oops
[11:23:26 PM] Prasand J.: I mean
[11:23:28 PM] Prasand J.: conclude
[11:23:40 PM] Prasand J.: whether you are a lover or a fighter in that respect
[11:23:45 PM] Prasand J.: will you accept
[11:23:47 PM] Prasand J.: or reject
[11:24:06 PM] Prasand J.: as such
[11:24:15 PM] Prasand J.: I’ve become significantly more potent as a fighter
[11:24:21 PM] Prasand J.: but found the lover that I did not know
[11:24:49 PM] Prasand J.: blar … i’m done.

Session Close (Ria Yoshida): Tue Nov 13 23:24:53 2007

Give it a few minutes before continuing.

Segment: Security Applied … Reflection.

Session Start (Prasand J.:Ria Yoshida): Tue Nov 13 23:53:48 2007

[11:53:50 PM] Ria Yoshida: how can you tell what is truth?

[11:53:50 PM] *** Auto-response sent to Ria Yoshida: “The search for perfection ends the moment it begins.” -Prasand

[11:53:55 PM] Ria Yoshida: matter fact… how can I tell what it real.. truth?
[11:55:54 PM] Prasand J.: because it cannot be debated
[11:56:03 PM] Prasand J.: when something
[11:56:08 PM] Prasand J.: regardless of how you look at it
[11:56:12 PM] Prasand J.: or try to attack it
[11:56:15 PM] Prasand J.: it remains the same
[11:56:19 PM] Prasand J.: then it is the truth
[11:56:25 PM] Prasand J.: because it is not fickle
[11:56:35 PM] Prasand J.: for example
[11:56:44 PM] Prasand J.: the perspective that right and wrong are not absolute
[11:56:48 PM] Prasand J.: cannot be debated
[11:56:56 PM] Prasand J.: people could try til they are blue in the face
[11:56:58 PM] Prasand J.: but in the end
[11:57:06 PM] Prasand J.: they can’t truly negate it
[11:57:17 PM] Prasand J.: they can only choose to be blind about it
[11:57:19 PM] Prasand J.: or deny it
[11:57:41 PM] Prasand J.: that’s all people can ever do in regards to the truth
[11:57:48 PM] Prasand J.: be blind about it, or deny it

[11:58:38 PM] Ria Yoshida: would you say that’s caused by ignorance, parents, society, etc?
[11:59:01 PM] Prasand J.: all of the above … even ourselves
[11:59:04 PM] Prasand J.: see the thing is
[11:59:11 PM] Prasand J.: people have a hard time coping with reality
[11:59:18 PM] Prasand J.: because their attempts are half-assed
[11:59:33 PM] Prasand J.: and people are not brave enough to push past the pain
[11:59:41 PM] Prasand J.: since in the beginning of accepting reality
[11:59:44 PM] Prasand J.: there is a lot of pain
[11:59:49 PM] Prasand J.: as one let’s go of their ego
[12:00:03 AM] Prasand J.: and that pain causes people to retreat
[12:00:09 AM] Prasand J.: you’ve experienced that pain
[12:00:12 AM] Prasand J.: with henry
[12:00:19 AM] Prasand J.: when you found out the things he said were lies
[12:00:29 AM] Prasand J.: it was much easier for you to be in denial
[12:00:33 AM] Prasand J.: than to accept the truth
[12:00:53 AM] Prasand J.: it’s self-taught as well as learned behavior
[12:01:19 AM] Prasand J.: dreaming on the other hand
[12:01:26 AM] Prasand J.: is a consequence of life
[12:01:31 AM] Prasand J.: as children
[12:01:36 AM] Prasand J.: we have a certain perception of the world
[12:01:43 AM] Prasand J.: an understanding that not even parents know
[12:01:54 AM] Prasand J.: but because they try to teach us certain things
[12:02:03 AM] Prasand J.: or they try to show us pain
[12:02:08 AM] Prasand J.: we tend to tune them out
[12:02:15 AM] Prasand J.: and get lost in our own worlds
[12:02:28 AM] Prasand J.: because we weren’t content with what we were being taught
[12:02:39 AM] Prasand J.: or what they tried to show us
[12:03:22 AM] Prasand J.: if you speak the truth to a child … they will listen
[12:03:28 AM] Prasand J.: it’s something I learned as a teacher
[12:03:35 AM] Prasand J.: they are more prone to listen to the truth than lies
[12:03:41 AM] Ria Yoshida: What do you think you would do differently… if so… for your children?
[12:03:51 AM] Ria Yoshida: oops
[12:04:04 AM] Ria Yoshida: that was a previous question… keep talking
[12:04:06 AM] Prasand J.: see that’s something which I’ve debated for awhile
[12:04:17 AM] Prasand J.: because I understand
[12:04:29 AM] Prasand J.: that choice is something my children should be entitled to also
[12:04:36 AM] Prasand J.: however
[12:04:41 AM] Prasand J.: if I was a single parent
[12:04:48 AM] Prasand J.: because of my addiction to reality and truth
[12:05:08 AM] Prasand J.: I’ll eliminate my children’s ability to dream
[12:05:11 AM] Prasand J.: however they want
[12:05:13 AM] Prasand J.: as such
[12:05:28 AM] Prasand J.: the woman I am with, I always rationalized
[12:05:36 AM] Prasand J.: that we should be complimentary in that regard
[12:05:41 AM] Prasand J.: where I don’t play with kids
[12:05:46 AM] Prasand J.: she’ll be the type that does
[12:05:53 AM] Prasand J.: where I may tell my children the truth
[12:05:57 AM] Prasand J.: she may be the type that lies
[12:06:07 AM] Prasand J.: hence why Tiffany was perfect for me in that regard
[12:06:20 AM] Prasand J.: but
[12:06:21 AM] Prasand J.: I dunno
[12:06:26 AM] Prasand J.: what I’d do to be honest
[12:06:29 AM] Prasand J.: in other situations
[12:06:38 AM] Prasand J.: I imagine I’ll just tell the truth
[12:06:43 AM] Prasand J.: and in the process
[12:06:51 AM] Prasand J.: will end up eliminating the very things
[12:06:55 AM] Prasand J.: which people believe
[12:07:01 AM] Prasand J.: are essential to one’s childhood
[12:07:11 AM] Prasand J.: but at the same time
[12:07:13 AM] Prasand J.: that doesn’t mean
[12:07:18 AM] Prasand J.: I’ll force it upon them
[12:07:28 AM] Prasand J.: it’s more so something in reference to the questions which are asked
[12:07:39 AM] Prasand J.: children are very inquisitive
[12:07:45 AM] Prasand J.: if they ask about sex
[12:07:49 AM] Prasand J.: I will tell the truth
[12:07:55 AM] Prasand J.: and discard such perceptions as
[12:07:58 AM] Prasand J.: “you’re not ready”
[12:08:11 AM] Prasand J.: that most adults or parents judge
[12:08:24 AM] Prasand J.: as they look down upon and belittle their child

[12:13:28 AM] Ria Yoshida: what if you see they are eager/horny and ‘understand’ the consequences of pregnancy or STD’s and sort but don’t fully comprehend the consequences?
[12:13:55 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol… I dunno… just random
[12:14:15 AM] Ria Yoshida: to see if I understand…
[12:14:21 AM] Ria Yoshida: with what you said
[12:14:29 AM] Ria Yoshida: my conflicts are caused from my ego
[12:14:40 AM] Ria Yoshida: that I’ve separated myself…
[12:14:53 AM] Ria Yoshida: retreated cause of pain of facing reality
[12:15:17 AM] Ria Yoshida: didn’t know how to cope and so chose denial/dream/blind
[12:15:51 AM] Ria Yoshida: and now… seeking answers… to face truth
[12:16:18 AM] Ria Yoshida: is the only way
[12:16:31 AM] Ria Yoshida: well, yes… truth is the only way lol.. I concure
[12:16:41 AM] Ria Yoshida: and yet its funny how I haven’t done so
[12:16:47 AM] Ria Yoshida: fear kept me back
[12:17:07 AM] Ria Yoshida: along with others… ego, self taught, etc
[12:17:27 AM] Ria Yoshida: and the way to know truth is that it’s something un-debatable
[12:18:10 AM] Ria Yoshida: when my brain goes koo koo for coco puffs
[12:18:24 AM] Ria Yoshida: and feelings are scrambled eggs
[12:18:49 AM] Ria Yoshida: I have to ‘fight’ the pain of it to push past it…?
[12:19:13 AM] Ria Yoshida: but I’m conflicted and my frontal lobe of the dome HURTS lol
[12:19:21 AM] Ria Yoshida: and thus that is caused by ego
[12:19:26 AM] Ria Yoshida: ……..
[12:19:35 AM] Prasand J.: no the pain in that case is caused by habit
[12:19:48 AM] Prasand J.: if you don’t use a part of your brain consistently
[12:19:51 AM] Prasand J.: it hurts when you do
[12:19:54 AM] Prasand J.: physical pain
[12:19:55 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[12:19:57 AM] Prasand J.: and emotional pain
[12:20:01 AM] Prasand J.: are two different things
[12:20:06 AM] Prasand J.: emotional pain is caused by ego
[12:20:13 AM] Prasand J.: due to dreams conflicting with reality
[12:20:20 AM] Prasand J.: physical pain is caused by various things
[12:20:52 AM] Prasand J.: even my brain hurts when I exhaust possibilities
[12:20:58 AM] Prasand J.: and I’m one who does it consistently
[12:21:02 AM] Ria Yoshida: :D
[12:21:18 AM] Prasand J.: but the truth is
[12:21:25 AM] Prasand J.: whatever I’m thinking about at that time
[12:21:32 AM] Prasand J.: I’m not used to thinking about all the time
[12:21:36 AM] Prasand J.: hence why it hurts
[12:21:44 AM] Prasand J.: my brain is usually in a specific mode

[12:22:29 AM] Ria Yoshida: the truth is… i love belonging somewhere and being accepted
[12:22:33 AM] Ria Yoshida: not my actual job
[12:23:03 AM] Ria Yoshida: I like getting credit…. and getting paid
[12:23:54 AM] Ria Yoshida: and feeling like I’m being proactive… productive…. when in truth could be going backwards… staying still since it’s not self work but work work
[12:24:00 AM] Ria Yoshida: as to my job
[12:24:25 AM] Ria Yoshida: it gives me purpose… something to wake up to in the morning
[12:24:38 AM] Ria Yoshida: cause without it I feel useless…
[12:24:49 AM] Ria Yoshida: and that makes me feel worthless
[12:25:18 AM] Ria Yoshida: is that facing reality…lol?
[12:25:24 AM] Prasand J.: yes
[12:25:36 AM] Prasand J.: to face reality and see the truth
[12:25:39 AM] Prasand J.: is where it begins
[12:25:49 AM] Prasand J.: you punish yourself
[12:25:54 AM] Prasand J.: because of what you’ve been taught
[12:26:02 AM] Prasand J.: you’ve been taught that certain things are right
[12:26:07 AM] Prasand J.: and are what a person should do
[12:26:15 AM] Prasand J.: that if you aren’t doing those things
[12:26:20 AM] Prasand J.: then you have no value
[12:26:22 AM] Prasand J.: no worth
[12:26:27 AM] Prasand J.: but is that the truth?
[12:26:34 AM] Prasand J.: do you truly have no value, no worth?
[12:26:44 AM] Prasand J.: is one’s worth at all times both defined by oneself
[12:26:50 AM] Prasand J.: and other’s perception of them?
[12:26:56 AM] Prasand J.: if you value yourself
[12:27:02 AM] Prasand J.: then it doesn’t matter what you’re doing
[12:27:06 AM] Prasand J.: and if others value you
[12:27:10 AM] Prasand J.: then it’s the same
[12:27:17 AM] Prasand J.: I’m a person that does not work consistently
[12:27:23 AM] Prasand J.: is not striving for greatness
[12:27:28 AM] Prasand J.: but am I worthless?
[12:27:43 AM] Prasand J.: there’s plenty of people that value me
[12:27:44 AM] Ria Yoshida: of course not!
[12:27:51 AM] Ria Yoshida: yes :)
[12:27:57 AM] Prasand J.: one’s worth is dictated by what they do
[12:28:06 AM] Prasand J.: not how much they are getting paid to do it
[12:28:14 AM] Prasand J.: the fact is
[12:28:22 AM] Prasand J.: what I do is priceless to most people I do it for
[12:29:05 AM] Prasand J.: learn to be content with and accept who you are
[12:29:09 AM] Prasand J.: whatever you are doing
[12:29:13 AM] Prasand J.: wherever you are

[12:29:55 AM] Ria Yoshida: the moments when I think/feel… damn it, I don’t want this… damn it why am I like htis?
[12:30:00 AM] Ria Yoshida: is losing?
[12:30:06 AM] Ria Yoshida: hunh :P
[12:30:36 AM] Ria Yoshida: if that makes sense…
[12:30:54 AM] Ria Yoshida: worth is dictated by what I do
[12:30:58 AM] Ria Yoshida: to other people?
[12:31:05 AM] Prasand J.: well win or lose … is also a relative perception
[12:31:14 AM] Prasand J.: everytime we lose something we win something else
[12:31:25 AM] Prasand J.: one thing cannot be given without taking away from another
[12:31:30 AM] Prasand J.: as such
[12:31:33 AM] Prasand J.: to question that
[12:31:34 AM] Ria Yoshida: yea, I know I just wrote lose to communicate message… not really the whole extremem thing
[12:31:47 AM] Prasand J.: is to merely debate a relative topic, which is egotistical
[12:31:56 AM] Prasand J.: k

[12:32:19 AM] Ria Yoshida: so instead of lose… in those moments I’m rejecting my self
[12:32:28 AM] Ria Yoshida: ah ha!
[12:32:32 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[12:32:40 AM] Ria Yoshida: back to worth…
[12:32:47 AM] Ria Yoshida: it’s dictated by action
[12:32:53 AM] Ria Yoshida: to other people and also myslef?
[12:33:08 AM] Prasand J.: no
[12:33:15 AM] Prasand J.: in those moments when you say you do not want it
[12:33:26 AM] Prasand J.: you’re rejecting whatever it is that you’re saying you do not want
[12:33:32 AM] Prasand J.: even if it means rejecting someone else
[12:33:39 AM] Prasand J.: you’re being selfish in those moments
[12:33:53 AM] Prasand J.: it is fine to be selfish
[12:34:02 AM] Prasand J.: but decide clearly
[12:34:06 AM] Prasand J.: do I want to be selfish
[12:34:11 AM] Prasand J.: or do I care about their happiness
[12:34:24 AM] Ria Yoshida: but it’s so haaaaard
[12:34:37 AM] Ria Yoshida: It’s so much easier to be half-assed about that shiet
[12:34:43 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol.. is that facing reality?
[12:34:43 AM] Prasand J.: things are only as difficult as we make them out to be
[12:34:47 AM] Prasand J.: it just so happens that
[12:34:56 AM] Prasand J.: almost everyone makes issues of ego
[12:34:59 AM] Prasand J.: out to be difficult
[12:35:10 AM] Prasand J.: so it’s the hardest lesson to learn
[12:35:25 AM] Ria Yoshida: it’s actually not hard.. I just don’t want to responsibility or to face the consequences after making a decision
[12:35:37 AM] Prasand J.: fear
[12:35:47 AM] Ria Yoshida: right…
[12:35:51 AM] Ria Yoshida: which is also retarded
[12:36:06 AM] Ria Yoshida: cause than I’m letting the universe decide shiet for me in a way…?
[12:36:18 AM] Ria Yoshida: I tr to escape something unescapable
[12:36:30 AM] Ria Yoshida: of course it’s gonnna come back and bite me in the ass
[12:37:34 AM] Ria Yoshida: I didn’t mean the lesson to learn ego isn’t hard
[12:37:44 AM] Ria Yoshida: that’s shits hard/tough
[12:38:08 AM] Ria Yoshida: i was referring to what I said about making decisions haaaaaard
[12:38:13 AM] Ria Yoshida: if that makes sense…
[12:38:16 AM] Ria Yoshida: :)
[12:38:48 AM] Prasand J.: I know and I addressed what you said
[12:38:54 AM] Ria Yoshida: k
[12:38:55 AM] Prasand J.: as well as continued my thought
[12:38:59 AM] Prasand J.: by reflecting

[12:40:58 AM] Prasand J.: if you typed something …. I missed it
[12:41:03 AM] Prasand J.: [12:38:54 AM] Ria Yoshida: k
[12:38:55 AM] Prasand J.: as well as continued my thought
[12:38:59 AM] Prasand J.: by reflecting
[12:42:14 AM] Ria Yoshida: Ria Yoshida: :)
Prasand J.: I know and I addressed what you said
Ria Yoshida: k
Prasand J.: as well as continued my thought
Prasand J.: by reflecting
Ria Yoshida: so…. I have ego, truth, reality, decisions to face
Ria Yoshida: ?
Ria Yoshida: lol
Ria Yoshida: those are the key components in stilling my madness
Prasand J. has gone offline.
Ria Yoshida: oh and acceptance
The person is not currently online.
Prasand J. is now online.
Prasand J. went away. (“The search for perfection ends the moment it begins.” -Prasand)

[12:42:41 AM] Prasand J.: well reality is truth
[12:43:17 AM] Ria Yoshida: k… so step out of riality and to reality
[12:43:20 AM] Ria Yoshida: damn it
[12:43:25 AM] Ria Yoshida: you gave me that name!
[12:43:55 AM] Prasand J.: because there are two types of people that truly live
[12:44:03 AM] Prasand J.: those that accept reality
[12:44:12 AM] Prasand J.: and those who are blissfully ignorant
[12:44:30 AM] Prasand J.: regardless of the type of person they are
[12:44:36 AM] Prasand J.: both people allow reality to be
[12:44:44 AM] Prasand J.: and exist in reality
[12:44:58 AM] Prasand J.: you just happen to dream as well
[12:45:04 AM] Prasand J.: and I don’t as much
[12:45:30 AM] Ria Yoshida: you used to…?
[12:45:43 AM] Ria Yoshida: or physical dream to see future wife/children?
[12:45:45 AM] Prasand J.: only in regard to love
[12:45:49 AM] Ria Yoshida: right…
[12:45:58 AM] Ria Yoshida: I dream outside of love?
[12:46:03 AM] Prasand J.: it’s the one way I dreamed, and only way I did so consistently
[12:46:14 AM] Prasand J.: however, the moment I let go of that
[12:46:22 AM] Prasand J.: is when I ceased to be a dreamer
[12:46:35 AM] Prasand J.: even in the small aspects that I consistently was
[12:46:45 AM] Prasand J.: you dream in regards to many things
[12:46:49 AM] Prasand J.: even about life itself
[12:47:03 AM] Prasand J.: like most people you dream in regards to most things
[12:47:20 AM] Prasand J.: however at the same time
[12:47:25 AM] Prasand J.: you dream less than them
[12:47:34 AM] Prasand J.: although the number of subjects you cover
[12:47:42 AM] Prasand J.: is as numerous as there’s
[12:47:45 AM] Prasand J.: theirs*
[12:47:55 AM] Prasand J.: you still accept reality more than others
[12:48:01 AM] Prasand J.: some people don’t discuss life
[12:48:08 AM] Prasand J.: they don’t think about it in depth
[12:48:10 AM] Prasand J.: as such
[12:48:21 AM] Prasand J.: you’re not as extreme as them
[12:48:33 AM] Ria Yoshida: so there’s still hope :D
[12:48:34 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[12:48:53 AM] Prasand J.: yes for you, in my eyes, no
[12:49:03 AM] Prasand J.: there is no hope with things that are certain
[12:49:09 AM] Prasand J.: hope is for the unsure
[12:49:15 AM] Prasand J.: for those that doubt
[12:49:21 AM] Prasand J.: and do not truly believe
[12:49:34 AM] Prasand J.: I know it’ll happen
[12:49:36 AM] Prasand J.: as such
[12:49:40 AM] Prasand J.: there’s no hope in my eyes

[12:50:04 AM] Ria Yoshida: i don’t know it’ll happen.. that’s why there’s hope
[12:50:21 AM] Prasand J.: yep, cause you doubt
[12:50:24 AM] Prasand J.: you’re not secure.
[12:50:25 AM] Ria Yoshida: I need to practice

[12:51:12 AM] Ria Yoshida: I feel like I did… or attempted before…
[12:51:20 AM] Ria Yoshida: I’ve had secure moments
[12:51:22 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[12:51:37 AM] Prasand J.: yes, and yes
[12:51:50 AM] Ria Yoshida: :)
[12:52:08 AM] Ria Yoshida: i seek for approval
[12:52:11 AM] Ria Yoshida: eh
[12:52:39 AM] Ria Yoshida: cause I’M UNSURE
[12:52:53 AM] Ria Yoshida: oops… hit the caps button
[12:52:56 AM] Prasand J.: interesting
[12:53:03 AM] Ria Yoshida: ?
[12:53:08 AM] Prasand J.: because I was thinking that when I typed “yes, and yes”
[12:53:23 AM] Prasand J.: i was thinking “do not look for me to validate your existence, or approve”
[12:53:29 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[12:53:37 AM] Ria Yoshida: and I was thinking the same hting
[12:53:55 AM] Ria Yoshida: why do I ask as if I’m asking Pras to validate me?
[12:54:07 AM] Ria Yoshida: I’ve noticed this a lot lately…
[12:54:14 AM] Ria Yoshida: I ask for reassurance
[12:54:46 AM] Ria Yoshida: when I answer questions I look as if I’m looking to see if I was right or wrong? Accepted or rejected?
[12:55:27 AM] Ria Yoshida: I’m facing it….. apart of me finds it highly annoying…. another thinks it retarded… and another cute :P

[12:55:46 AM] Prasand J.: without ridicule

[12:56:03 AM] Ria Yoshida: I need to approve myself
[12:56:22 AM] Ria Yoshida: in another way… just accept what I’m doing
[12:56:25 AM] Prasand J.: you don’t need to approve anything
[12:56:31 AM] Prasand J.: just accept
[12:56:37 AM] Ria Yoshida: :D ah ha!
[12:56:43 AM] Prasand J.: you’re egotistically trying to be right
[12:56:46 AM] Prasand J.: be better
[12:56:50 AM] Prasand J.: instead of being wrong
[12:56:51 AM] Prasand J.: or bad
[12:56:56 AM] Prasand J.: so you judge yourself
[12:56:56 AM] Ria Yoshida: to you right now?
[12:57:00 AM] Prasand J.: saying it’s retarded
[12:57:07 AM] Prasand J.: which is why
[12:57:11 AM] Prasand J.: you want to approve yourself
[12:57:17 AM] Prasand J.: you don’t need to approve yourself
[12:57:22 AM] Prasand J.: by seeking to approve of yourself
[12:57:30 AM] Prasand J.: you’re still continuing the very same
[12:57:34 AM] Prasand J.: egotistical cycle
[12:57:42 AM] Prasand J.: you don’t need to approve
[12:57:45 AM] Prasand J.: just accept
[12:57:55 AM] Prasand J.: without ridicule
[12:58:03 AM] Prasand J.: without judging yourself
[12:58:18 AM] Ria Yoshida: dude… accepting is so intimate
[12:58:31 AM] Prasand J.: it is who i am .. it is neither good, nor bad … but it is who I am
[12:58:43 AM] Prasand J.: it’s to allow oneself in
[12:58:48 AM] Prasand J.: therefore
[12:58:53 AM] Prasand J.: the more we accept someone
[12:58:58 AM] Prasand J.: the more intimate the relationship is
[12:59:01 AM] Prasand J.: for example
[12:59:04 AM] Prasand J.: Stephanie and I
[12:59:20 AM] Prasand J.: we’re extremely intimate
[12:59:29 AM] Prasand J.: probably the most I’ve ever been
[01:00:05 AM] Ria Yoshida: :)

[01:01:02 AM] Ria Yoshida: k.. i need to marinate and go to sleep for tomorrow
[01:01:11 AM] Ria Yoshida: thanks p~chyaaaaan
[01:01:24 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[01:01:35 AM] Prasand J.: k …. you’re welcome, always
[01:01:38 AM] Prasand J.: later
[01:01:45 AM] Ria Yoshida: :D
[01:02:08 AM] Ria Yoshida: that’s the first time you’ve accepted my thankyouuuuu!
[01:02:16 AM] Ria Yoshida: that was awesome :P
[01:02:27 AM] Prasand J.: if you perceive that, cool
[01:02:31 AM] Prasand J.: but it’s not the truth
[01:02:44 AM] Ria Yoshida: well, no you’ve accepted my thank you before
[01:02:59 AM] Ria Yoshida: the truth is… it felt good for you to say your welcome, always
[01:03:05 AM] Ria Yoshida: I felt accepted prasand
[01:03:05 AM] Prasand J.: the right thought, results in the right speech
[01:03:08 AM] Prasand J.: =)
[01:03:22 AM] Prasand J.: it’s a zen concept @ right speech
[01:03:28 AM] Prasand J.: it’s merely to speak the truth
[01:03:32 AM] Prasand J.: if we think the truth
[01:03:35 AM] Prasand J.: we speak the truth
[01:03:48 AM] Ria Yoshida: well like just now
[01:03:53 AM] Prasand J.: yep
[01:04:05 AM] Ria Yoshida: I thought it felt good for you to say you’re welcome
[01:04:23 AM] Ria Yoshida: and yet worped it by saying that’s the first time
[01:04:28 AM] Ria Yoshida: what the heck was that?
[01:04:33 AM] Ria Yoshida: sarcasm? habit?
[01:04:40 AM] Prasand J.: habit
[01:04:57 AM] Prasand J.: we tend to blow things out of proportion
[01:05:02 AM] Prasand J.: making it seem more dramatic
[01:05:12 AM] Prasand J.: “that’s the first time ever!!!!!”
[01:05:18 AM] Prasand J.: to express how much we like it
[01:05:24 AM] Prasand J.: when that’s not necessary
[01:06:00 AM] Prasand J.: we can still express how much we like something without being so dramatic about it
[01:06:20 AM] Ria Yoshida: true
[01:06:38 AM] Ria Yoshida: I like you prasand
[01:06:41 AM] Ria Yoshida: lol
[01:06:45 AM] Prasand J.: lol
[01:07:15 AM] Ria Yoshida: i also like coziness in my bed
[01:07:19 AM] Ria Yoshida: and sleep
[01:07:34 AM] Ria Yoshida: thanks again…. :D
[01:07:39 AM] Ria Yoshida: oyasumi
[01:07:44 AM] Prasand J.: goodnight

Session Close (Ria Yoshida): Wed Nov 14 01:07:56 2007